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2024

january

Spiritual teachers talk about sympathetic joy (or mudita in Buddhism), the concept of feeling happy for someone else’s success, and I think that was part of what was going on.

 

I loved helping my fellow performers shine.

march

Interestingly, I’ve also found that trusting my gut has led to more mistakes along the way than simply following perceived wisdom. Hmm, then why do it?

Because it leads to more learning. And eventually, over time, a stronger gut.

may

Has this happened to you?

You’re hoping for something from your partner, but they don't give it to you. So, the next time they ask you for something, you withhold. 

Does that behavior serve you? Probably not!

july

How long can you hold your breath?

Most people can do it for a minute or two, and that was true for me, too.

Spurred on by a newspaper article I saw, I took a multi-day course with some friends to see how much further I could go.

february

Interestingly, I’ve also found that trusting my gut has led to more mistakes along the way than simply following perceived wisdom. Hmm, then why do it?

Because it leads to more learning. And eventually, over time, a stronger gut.

april

And most importantly, I wasn’t paying attention to the voice inside me saying my original dream, the one that brought me to New York, didn’t have the power it once did.

The voice grew stronger. I ignored it and pushed harder.
 
And then one day, I crashed.

june

This experience was a helpful reminder to me. Most people are well-intended, and most offenses are accidental.

 

So unless I’m sure, it’s so much better to assume that whatever offense I may have felt wasn’t deliberate.

august

It’s the end of summer.

 

Time to enjoy and not go too deep.


I hope you are able to enjoy every minute. Love, laugh, and live your truth.

september

I tell them they don’t need to put in any set hours and they can work from anywhere. However, I do explain that I have one crucial expectation, and I express it cryptically. 

 

I tell them I want their shower time.

2023

january

I still do a lot of things in my ritual before playing. But if I can’t do some of them, I don’t stress out about it. I know I’ll be fine.
 
Do you have similar approaches to stressful situations? Do some of your coping mechanisms actually increase your stress?

february

A little more than 20 years ago I decided to record what would become my first album. I had written enough songs I felt proud of, and I had been playing them for friends and starting to perform them in public.

 

I was ready.

 

Or so I thought!

march

I imagined that my guardian angel was helping me avoid injury or bad frostbite, and the only way she could do it was to knock me out of commission for a few days. Whether that was actually true, it helped me keep a smile on my face the whole time.

 

How do you deal with adversity?

 

Are you able to find the silver lining?

april

The performance began, and he was fully into it – every movement precise and beautiful to watch and (of course) to listen to.

 

We were transported and loved it. By the end (five minutes later) he was covered in sweat (it’s a big drum) and beaming.

may

I’ve been making this album in Memphis with Matt Ross-Spang, a Grammy-winning producer, who’s worked with John Prine, Jason Isbell, and Iron & Wine, among others. He’s been a joy to work with.

Matt’s process is very different from the way I made my last two records, however, and the contrast has been eye-opening.

june

But…what if I’m just average at making decisions, yet very good at rationalizing the choices I made?

Life is not a controlled experiment. You choose one path and live it.

july

Aside from our love of music, Calvin and I couldn’t be more different.
He’s tall, I’m short.
He’s black, I’m white.
He’s gay, I’m straight.
He grew up in the church, and I grew up agnostic.
 
We had three hours.So what could we write about?

august

It’s the end of summer. Time to enjoy and not go too deep.
I hope you are able to enjoy every minute. Love, laugh, and live your truth.

In the immortal words of the Rolling Stones,

You can’t always get what you want.
But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need.

september

We all have puzzles we have to solve in life. Should I take this job? Should I move?

 

Should I marry the person I’m with? Important decisions, and usually there’s not a clear right answer. But with crosswords or other word puzzles, there is a right answer.

 

When you’re done, you KNOW you’ve solved it. And solving provides a great dopamine rush.

october

The common element in the book’s stories is that success comes from choices that increase confidence and competence, including working very hard and choosing where to focus effort.

 

In each case, there is also scaffolding (a great coach, supportive teachers and/or family, others pursuing similar goals, etc.).

november

To me, creating art is all about emotional expression. The stronger the emotion, the more powerful the art. But emotions are ephemeral.

The feelings that inspired a piece of music may no longer be present, which can create a dilemma if the artist likes performing live!

december

My Dad said yes, of course, and this led to my being able to tell my friends that my Dad had a photo in Penthouse magazine, when that publication reviewed one of Asimov’s books.

 

But I digress…

2022

march

My wife recently gave my daughter a riddle: “What needs to be broken before it can be used?” The actual answer is an egg, but my daughter quickly replied, ‘A heart!’

I thought it was a great answer, and it made me think about the people I know who seem to be most connected to their heart.

february

We made something I’m really proud of. And now we were done. With the creating at least.
 
Time to shift gears. It’s time to market.To promote.To sell. 
Yuck.
 
I struggle with this part.

january

We live in an age in which access to information is nearly limitless, which has its benefits, but it has also made us confront the world and its nearly suffocating torrent of problems. At times it can feel overwhelming.

If you’re honest, has learning more about these events helped you in any way? More importantly, if you're just reading about it and not taking action, has it helped the subject of whatever trial or tribulation you are reading about in any way? 

june

The experience was a wake-up call for my friend, and I love her for being willing to share this story with others.

It's made me question my own biases - conscious, unconscious, and what my upbringing and experience may have imparted. When have I misperceived reality?

may

This time has me filled with gratitude to the many people who have made this possible, and I wanted to take a pause and thank them.
 
To everyone that played or sang or helped out on Spaces, thank you for your spirit, your talent, and your energy. We made something beautiful!

april

I’m happier believing that no one at the facility was lying to me or a thief. I call this approach going with the Most Reasonable Interpretation, or (wait for it), MRI.
 
I’ve found that approaching most situations in life with an MRI makes me happier.
 
Do you feel similarly?

july

Many cultures use healers or shamans to channel the power of the human mind to heal maladies. There is a common foundation among these non-medicinal healers that faith in their powers will help heal a patient. 

And it works, if you believe.

august

It’s the end of summer. Time to enjoy and not go too deep.
I hope you are able to enjoy every minute. Love, laugh, and live your truth.

In the immortal words of the Grateful Dead, Whoa, oh, what I want to know, is are you kind?

september

That seems to me to be the secret of life. Find a way to do what you love, and give back at the same time.
 
What lights you up?

And have you found ways to do it and give back at the same time?

october

I loved trying to solve the mysteries before Henry did. But I think the biggest reason I still remember the Black Widowers Club so many years later is because it introduced me to the concept of service – that at some point when I’m much older, someone will ask me what good I’ve done on earth, and I’ll want to have a good answer.
 
So, how do you justify your existence?
 

november

Here’s a thought experiment.
Let’s say you’re at a party and meet a stranger who you really connect with.
You’re talking and get to know them a little bit, and then they ask you a surprising question.

“What’s the worst thing that ever happened to you?” 
How do you answer?
 

december

Are there times in life when you have to perform (as an artist or a businessman or a leader) and inspire others?

Do you get nervous and how do you deal with it?
 

2021

march

I armed myself with a hammer, chisel, saw, and a screwdriver, and snuck out of the house around 11pm, after my parents went to bed.Fifteen minutes later I was contemplating my prize, which lay atop a standard 8-10 foot street sign pole.  

february

I've found that choosing where to put my energy is at least as important as how hard I work. Have you found this to be true in your life?

january

Can you think of times you weren’t honest because it was just too hard emotionally?Are there times you’ve lied to yourself?Some people’s perception of reality remains incredibly distorted.And if their personalities are sufficiently strong, they can distort other people’s realities as well.

june

Those lessons lasted less than two years, until around the time I left for college. But they changed my life. And I will always be grateful.
 
Have you had mentors in your life that believed in you, perhaps more than you believed in yourself?

may

If you're in a committed relationship, and you’ve never experienced a mutual attraction with another person, congratulations! I would venture to say you’re in the minority.

april

I was far too young for Elaine, but she didn’t mind sharing a ride with a smiling kid who was just beginning to discover girls.

I will always remember the feeling I had, looking up at the night sky and full of wonder.

september

I had upset a friend and collaborator.

They were really pissed, and wanted to quit the project we had put tons of time and energy into.
 

I had done it completely accidentally, not understanding that my actions would upset them. 

august

Freedom is power,

not the other way around.

july

But then something cool happened. I got in touch with a newer, more subtle magic.

And a realization that music is very deep. You can always go further, and find more mysteries, and more magic.

december

The stepfather is a caricature, of course. But there are also very few people in the world (or at least my world), who don’t have some control issues – times when we get frustrated at things not going the way we think they should …or at someone behaving in a way we consider inappropriate, …or at someone not understanding our point of view.

So what do we do when we feel that people are not behaving reasonably?
 

november

Of course, there are limits. When I was in college, I almost died twice in the same week – once on a mountain and once almost falling down a waterfall – both times pushing through when I was scared. I’ve since learned to be a bit more measured when it comes to taking physical chances! 

october

There’s a reason people use the expression growing pains instead of growing pleasure.

Growing isn’t usually fun. Having grown is.

2020

march

When unexpected things happen, we choose the reasons that resonate for us - reasons that fit into our understanding of the world and ourselves. These reasons form a narrative, and that narrative creates a lens through which we see the world, a lens that shapes our reality and influences others.

february

My anger was really strong. It came in waves. In fact, a few times it literally came in waves, as I found myself in a rage while surfing, one of my favorite things to do in the world, and not being able to enjoy it.
 
I was pissed. I engaged in elaborate revenge fantasies, things that I knew wouldn’t lead to happiness. They sure were fun to think about though!

january

We are the product of millions of years of evolution, a process that has helped select for traits that keep humanity going. It stands to reason that our strongest motivator is survival.

As I have mentioned before, when I’m trying to do something hard, approaching the obstacle as if it’s a matter of life or death can be helpful.

june

She said, “We just follow the energy.” Whatever gives us the most energy, we do it.

I realized that was true for me as well. When I follow the energy, things go better in my life. 

may

I fall in love with my creation, feeling like it's the best song anyone has ever written. Then I fall out of love and go back to editing. Euphoria, despair, deep concentration – they’re all there. It's an all-consuming process!

Needless to say, I'm not the most easygoing human if I'm interrupted during this process. Don’t mess with my muse!

april

I remember one songwriter who brought in a song with a lyric about “purple rain." One of our core members asked nicely what her intent was in quoting a famous Prince lyric. She got very defensive, and when it came his turn to play a song, she went on the attack, saying something like, “Who are you to question my lyrics when you’ve written such drivel!” Needless to say, she wasn’t invited back.

september

The first time I stepped inside a church, I was in high school. It was a funeral for several members of a wonderful Catholic family, the unfortunate victims of a horrible accident. I remember being moved by the sanctity of the building and the solemnity of the occasion.

Then the preacher spoke.

august

There's so much craziness happening in the world. But the birds outside my window don't seem to notice.

july

What happens to humans under stress?
One consequence is that we have a higher need for certainty. When our fight or flight instinct is triggered, we need to feel sure.
 
That’s the main way I am processing some of the craziness that’s been happening.

december

In the crazy materialistic culture of Wall Street, I had learned something surprising. 

Selfishness and generosity are not opposites. The happier you are, the easier it is to be magnanimous to others.

november

As a songwriter, I try to be as connected to my emotions as is possible.
As a numbers guy, I trust math and science to point to the best path.
It’s always interesting when the two point in different directions, since they are equally strong in me.
What do you trust more, your rational brain or your gut?

october

The easier we make it for people to truly serve their country (in a way that feels rewarding and true to their beliefs, and doesn’t require them to be career politicians), the more likely we will get better people in government.

Wouldn’t that be nice?
 

2019

june

The owner heard my story and agreed to hear me play. I was nervous - my hands shook each time I lifted them off the keys. But I was determined. I performed those early originals with more passion than ever before, and by the time I finished I was beaming. 
I was the only one.

march

I was inspired to write this song when my wife told me she felt I wasn’t paying enough attention to our family.

I tried to write it from her perspective, and then switched it around, since I also miss her when she’s away. 

february

I’m sure you got a lot of emails today.
How many made you smile?
How many made you feel good?
If you’re like me, not many.

january

Have you fallen down a rabbit hole recently and lost sight of the big picture?
Were you able to regain perspective?

may

Why do you do this?I have this memory of being 12 and dancing around my room to the Beatles.She came in, smiled, and said something like “All You Need is Love? That’s not true. You need more than love. You need to learn skills, earn money…”

april

The shoot itself was hardly glamorous though – we were there for eight hours, mostly sitting around in the cold (the venue had no heat and it was 40 degrees outside).

 

I guess that’s show business.

september

A coach once told me that if you wanted to achieve the highest level of excellence in something, it helps to behave like it is a matter of life or death.
But if you actually believe that putting on a great show is a matter of life or death, you’re a little insane. 

august

In 2012, my friend Craig bought a few hundred acres in the Ecuadorian Cloud Forest to save it from being cleared for cattle ranching and reintroduce some ancient plants.
He’s been threatened many times by local dairy farmers (some of them wielding machetes). But he didn’t give up.

july

Why do you do this?I had been working incredibly hard on a big dream that motivated me every day. But when it came true, I didn’t know what came next. And that made me restless, dissatisfied. My life blew up. The woman left me (can’t blame her). I took a break from my business (almost lost it). And I started searching.

december

But, I also realized that age has its benefits. I’m wiser, and consequently subject to fewer illusions. I’m blessed to be performing for the sole reason of having a great time, following a passion, and trying to inspire others.

november

Balance is wonderful. But if you’re trying to accomplish something truly great, it’s almost impossible to not be a little obsessive while doing it. The good news is that it's okay for things to get out of balance - for a time. 

october

Prince, John Coltrane – two of the greatest musicians of our time. Even after achieving world-class mastery, they worked relentlessly to get better and create even more magic. On the flip side, both also struggled with addiction to drugs and alcohol, and perished early from related effects. I wonder…is it possible to create so much magic, and also lead a somewhat balanced life?

2018

september

Why do you do this?
It’s a question I’ve been asked a few times...

october

Artists are human and no matter how much we prepare, we will always make mistakes...

november

Water runs downhill, following the path of least resistance. Humans also follow the path of least resistance. I try to overcome this tendency by figuring out what motivates me the most

december

I have a good friend who writes symphonies. Back when he was starting out and unknown, he learned that you could get a discount from a concert hall if you were affiliated with a recognized charity. 

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